The idea of self-care can seem amorphous and confusing. We readily associate self-care with vacations or spa days. However, we can forget that even the simplest forms of self-care can be restorative and worked into our everyday life.
To help conceptualize this idea, imagine we are all only given so many units of energy to spend every day. The units slowly deplete throughout the day, but luckily we can gain units back through self-care.
For example, let’s say we start each day with 25 units:
Starting the day after a poor night of sleep: - 1 unit
Commuting to work in traffic: - 3 units
Listening to an entertaining podcast during the commute: + 1 unit
Giving a presentation at work: - 4 units
Taking a 15 minute coffee break with your favorite type of latté: + 1 unit
Replying to work emails: - 2 units
Answering difficult client calls: - 4 units
Lunch away from the desk: + 1 unit
Meeting with boss: - 2 units
Post-work yoga class: + 3 units
Commuting home again in traffic: - 3 units
Making dinner (depending on how you feel about cooking): - 2 units
Listening to your favorite music while cooking: + 1 unit
Having a positive conversation with your roommate or partner: + 1 unit
Doing after-dinner dishes: - 2 units
Finishing laundry: - 2 units
Taking a long shower or bath with your favorite candle lit: + 1 unit
By the end of this day, we would have depleted all 25 units of our energy. Fortunately, we worked in simple self-care activities that helped us gain back 9 units of energy. We feel tired but not completely drained.
When we end everyday completely drained, we have to start borrowing units from the next day so that every day we are starting with less and less units to expend. This is how we end up totally exhausted and vulnerable to utilizing coping mechanisms that tempt us with instant gratification for stress reduction: drinking, smoking, bingeing, restricting, etc.
They may say an “apple a day can keep the doctor away”, but I say “daily self-care makes you a lot less vulnerable to unhealthy coping mechanisms”. Not as catchy but just as important.